For Taylor Lynn

It’s way too late to say Happy New Year, but welcome back lol. It’s been a while - I know, I know. To be honest, there’s so much to unpack and I don’t really know where to begin. As corny as it may sound, 2023 was one of the best years of my life. I spent it living in God’s goodness, grace, and mercy. I spent it doing what I love most, with the people I love most. I traveled to new places, said “yes” to more adventures, had some memorable late nights, and overall learned the definition of true joy. God has placed the best people in my life and the circle around me is just… amazing.

The circle is missing a member though… I have avoided writing about this for some time because, well, there are really no words. Some of the best moments of 2023 ended up being some of the last moments. I lost one of my friends in January and nothing has been the same since. One of my best friends, my dawg, the funniest person I know, the inseparable Taylor Lynn & Tyler Lynn. We met in 7th grade and have been close ever since. I can barely remember a time that I didn’t know Taylor, to be honest. She was the eyes behind the lens, the queen of audio messages, had a smile to light up every room she entered, and is likely the funniest girl you’ve ever met. Her sense of humor and timely jokes are unmatched. To my other friends, I’m sorry, but no one is as funny as Taylor is lol. To give you a glimpse into one of the greatest people I am blessed to know, I will insert a snippet of the speech I wrote for Taylor’s service:

“Taylor was the definition of a true friend – to show up for you in times of need, to encourage you, to check in on you, to make you smile when you need it, to remind you of who you are in God, to sing with, to dance with, to go through life with.  Navigating your 20s is hard, but it’s a whole lot of fun when you have someone like Taylor by your side.  I’ve never imagined life without anyone in my circle, and I’m still trying to wrap my mind around all of this.  I don’t have all the answers, but what I do know is Taylor is in God’s hands.  Psalms 24:1 says “The earth is the Lord’s, and the fullness thereof, and all they that dwell within.”  I find comfort in knowing that the same hands that created the Earth hold Taylor Lynn McClure, all of you, and myself.

I also find comfort in knowing that Taylor and I never held back on expressing our love and appreciation for one another.  I can hear her laugh, see her smile, and our memories play constantly in my mind.  I recorded a video when Taylor was dancing around and she said, “somebody send somebody this, and tell them that’s my friend, that’s her.”  When I see all of the social media posts, read what people wrote on the posters at the vigil, hear about the scholarships created in her name, and see the outpouring of love, I say to myself “that’s my friend, that’s her”.”

…I’ve never lost a friend before, so this kind of grief is an unfamiliar territory. Through God’s grace and the prayers of many, I manage to make it through the day. 2023 was extra special because so much of it was spent with Taylor. When I tell you we had a tiiiiime, we had a TIME. Most of our memories begin with “if you know, you know” or “you just had to be there”. I never would have guessed that it would be our last full year spent together but the videos and pictures we took will give me a lifetime of memories. We grew up together, so this is just crazy to me. I miss my friend and will do everything in my power to keep her memory alive and tell others of her legacy.

I had a dream about her recently. She called on FaceTime and the first thing you hear is, “hey girrrl!!!” Her famous line lol. Suddenly, the video went blurry and the audio went mute. I could tell she was laughing and talking, but I couldn’t quite see her or hear her. She was having a really good time too. I was trying to tell her that I couldn’t really see her or hear her but I know she was trying to tell me something but she couldn’t hear me. At the very end of the call, she said, “anyway, I just wanted to tap in real quick and let y’all know I miss you guys. Sorry I couldn’t be there but I’m doing well…”. She said more but that was the gist of it. And that’s how I feel in real life - that she’s so close, yet so far, but I know she’s okay. I already know she 2-stepped right into the pearly gates with her blue cup and has been chillin’ ever since lol.

My two cents is this… Take pictures, often. Record videos, often. One day, that will be all you have left of someone. Love on your people while they are still here to feel it, hear it, and experience it. Value those who value you. Real friends will show up and show out for you - don’t take that for granted. Water your friendships and enjoy the blessing of watching each other grow through the years. Good friends are hard to come by so when you find your people, love on your people and stick by them through all that life gives us. The petty arguments that you have - fix it. Once someone is gone, there is no making amends. Save yourself the tears and regret and learn how to take accountability in your friendships. Taylor and I didn’t leave anything unsaid and I love that for us. Oh, and another thing - stop using people’s death for your personal spotlight. It’s not a competition of who knew them the longest and who was closest to them. Let your relationship with that person speak for itself. The loudest in the room isn’t always actually saying anything…

A couple weeks ago I turned 30, my first birthday without Taylor. In my next post I’ll share some lessons that I learned in my 20s, and I promise it won’t be the cliche ones lol. (I might even drop some tea.) *This is also me holding myself accountable by telling you that I’ll come back to make a new post because, well, we know how I get. Until next time, I’ll leave you with some words from Taylor’s podcast, Blue Cup Convos:

“You should always use your time - for whatever it is that you wanna do, no matter if you have to go to work, if you gotta go to school. Whatever obligations you have, take some time for yourself.” -Taylor McClure.

Taylor Lynn, I am thankful to have spent so much of my 30 years here with you, friend. I miss you my girl. Like we always used to say, “until the day after forever, Taylor Lynn & Tyler Lynn”. I’ll see you on the other side, save a spot for me. -Tyler Lynn

All My Love,

Tyler

“I have told you these things so that in Me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.” John 16:33 NIV